new case of bird flu

 

 

 

 

 

why a women has two hands

 

 

 

why guys have two hands

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hope everyone can look pass msn

and smile

  The Iraqi Hockey Player

Toronto coach Pat Quinn sends scouts out around looking for a new center to hopefully help win Toronto the Stanley Cup.

 One of his scouts informs him of a young Iraqi center who he thinks will turn out to be a true superstar. So, Pat flies to Iraq to watch him and is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to the ACC.

Two weeks later Toronto is down 4-0 at home to Montreal with only 8 minutes left. Pat gives the young Iraqi center the nod to go on and he puts him on in place of Sundin.

 The lad is a sensation, scores 5 goals in 8 minutes and wins the game for Toronto. The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media love the new star. 

 When he comes off the ice he phones his Mum to tell her about his first day in the NHL. "Hi Mum, guess what?" he says. "I played for 8 minutes today, we were 4-0 down but I scored 5 goals and we won.  Everybody loves me, the fans, the players and the media, they all love me". 

 Great," says his Mum, "let me tell you about my day. Your father got shot in the street, your sister and I were raped and beaten and your brother has joined a gang of looters, while you were having a  great time". 

The young lad is very upset. "What can I say Mum, but I'm so sorry"

"Sorry!" says his Mum, "It's your damned fault that we moved to Scarborough in the first place!

 

Quote

Its 2006! Kiss Me Day! January 10th

Hola!!

Happy Tarah is Back!

 

 

Its Very Simple...and who doesnt love a good kiss??

 

 

Sound like fun?

 

 

 

All ya gotta do is sign up at Tarahs Space

 

http://spaces.msn.com/members/kayleejagain

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Quote

by popular demand!

It's Ba-a-aCK!!!!

 

 

 

How about we spread some holiday cheer the spaces way!  Thursday Dec 15th is HOLIDAY HUGFEST!

 

Spread the word, And hug Away!

http://spaces.msn.com/members/Annetteslilspace/

 

 

 

 

In Flanders Fields the poppies blow Between the crosses row on row, That mark our place; and in the sky The larks, still bravely singing, fly Scarce heard amid the guns below.

 

We are the Dead. Short days ago We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow, Loved and were loved, and now we lie In Flanders fields.

 

Take up our quarrel with the foe: To you from failing hands we throw The torch; be yours to hold it high. If ye break faith with us who die We shall not sleep, though poppies grow In Flanders fields.

There was a man who really took care of his body. One day he took a look in the mirror and noticed that he was tan all over except for his penis. So he decided to do something about it. He went to the beach and got completely undressed and buried himself in the sand, except for his penis, which he left sticking out.

 

Two old ladies were strolling along the beach, one using a cane. Upon seeing the thing sticking up out of the sand, she began to move it around with her cane, remarking to the other lady, ''There is no justice in this world.'' The other lady asked what she meant.

 

"Well, when I was 20, I was curious about it. When I was 30, I enjoyed it. When I was 40, I asked for it. When I was 50, I paid for it. When I was 60, I prayed for it. When I was 70, I forgot all about it.

 

Now I'm 80 and the damn things are growing wild and I'm too old to squat!"

 

*******************************************************

 

 

 

Take the quiz: "what kind of drug are you? (includes pictures)"

cocaine.
you are cocaine. addictive, expensive and confident.

NOW THAT HALLOWEEN IS OVER YOU KNOW WHAT THAT    MEANS

 

as of november 8 2005   46 DAYS TILL CHRISTMAS

*************************************************************************************

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100% How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life? Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions: If A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z equal 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then: H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98% and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But, A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And, B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103% AND,

look how far ass kissing will take you. A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G 1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top. LOL :)

 

 

 True story, I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.

 

 "The moral of this story is:Always keep your condoms in your car."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

just a funny joke 

 

 Dear Husband: I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or any thing. Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.

Your Ex-Wife P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

 

 

Dear Ex-Wife; Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week. The first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed Rich As Hell and Free!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem

    

just want to say thank you soo much to justin for making me these wonderful pictures of my daughters for me

happy halloween

go visit his space and check out some of his work http://spaces.msn.com/members/scaryjesus/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You're a Wild Drunk

You can get enough drink. Seriously, you'll just go puke and start pounding them back again!

♥THE ABC's OF EX BOYFRIENDS 

♥ A is for the bad ass I thought he was.

♥ B is for BULLSHIT which is what he was full of.

♥ C is for the commitment that was never there.

♥ D is for the dildo he didn't know I had.

♥ D is also for "damn the bad luck" which is what I have in dating men. 

♥ E is for everything he said we'd do, everything he said he was, and everything he's not.

♥ E is also for ego. His was bigger than a hot air balloon.

♥ F is for faithful as long as there wasn't something or someone better to do.

♥ G is for GOD, the one he thought he was and wanted to be worshipped as.

♥ G is also for the spot he could never find!

♥ H is for laughter (HA! HA!) the last sound he heard from me as he was walking out the door.

♥ I is for impotent which is what I told everyone he was.

♥ I is also for the inbreeding that occurred in his Podunk family.

♥ J is for jugular, the one I'd love to sever.

♥ K is for key, the one that made the lovely designs on his truck.

♥ K is also for kick in the balls which is what I'm gonna give him if I see him again.

♥ L is for love in most cases, but exceptions have been made.

♥L is for LOSER in this case along with LUSH (he drank an awful lot).

♥ M is for MAN. Has anyone been able to find one? Have you ever met one? Do you know where any are?

♥ N is for the narcotics. He drove me past alcohol.

♥ O is for the orgasm he thought he made me have.

♥ P is for PAYBACKS. Remember they are HELL!

♥ Q is for queer. I sometimes wonder if he is.

♥ R is for the hopeless romantic he said he was. He was half right. He was hopeless, not to mention worthless. ♥ R is also for the ring that he can't afford and will never buy.

♥ S is for the sugar they found in his gas tank.

 ♥S is also for satisfied, which he rarely made me feel.

♥ T is for typical, typical little boy playing at being a man.

♥ U is for umbilical cord which was never severed when his mother gave birth.

♥ U is also for the ugly girl he is dating now.

♥ V is for the voodoo doll I made of him. Pins are inserted of course.

♥ W is for wife, the one he said he didn't have.

♥ X is what he is to me now!!!!

♥ Y is for why the hell did I ever get involved with him.

♥ Z is for the Zoloft that I had to start taking.

 

 

♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

HEY EVERYONE TODAY IS LISA'S BIRTHDAY GO TO HER SPACE AND WISH HER A HAPPY BIRTHDAY

http://spaces.msn.com/members/pepper-tooth 

Think of a letter

between A and W.

Repeat it out loud as

 you scroll down.

 

 

 

 

Keep going . . .

 Don't stop . . .

 

 

 

 

Think of an animal that

begins with that letter.

Repeat it out loud as

 you scroll down.

 

 

 

 

Think of either a man's/woman's

 name that

 begins with the

last

 letter in the

animals name

 

 

 

 

Almost there.........

 

 

Now count out the letters

in that name on the fingers

of the hand you are

not using to scroll down.

Take the hand you counted

 with and hold it out in front

 of you at face level

 

 

 

 

 

Look at your palm very

closely and notice the

lines in your hand

 

 

 

 

 

 

Do the lines take the form of the first letter

in the persons name?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Of course they fuckin' don't........

Now smack yourself in the head, get a life,